how to be ur good fren

I really dunno what I've done wrong.. Y r u treating me this way. I jus wan to be ur Fren ur sis. Why Izit so hard? U mus be thinking I'm more of a trouble n nuisance to u now that's y u r shutting me out fr ur life. U need her more than me..of cos.That's y u r not contacting me anymore. Just like this? What happened? I refused to accept that this might be the reason. Cos I know u r not like this. I know u. U must be havin a hard time too. But u simply can't have me n her together  in your life thus u need to make a choice. What happened to what you said when u told me to trust n believe you. That you will make this work? What happen to me oso? Jus 3 days n I'm flustered n worried you might really leave me le.. What happened to me too? Why m I feeling scared and worried? Y?

I cannot think right and cannot focus. My life is in a mess now. I always know if you were to leave me 1 day I'll go crazy. I really m going to now. Pls can you at least tell me I'm just worrying myself? I jus need to give you time off to settle your prob w her. For her to trust you. For her to feel she is your most impt person. I dun need to be your most impt person in your life. I never feel I'll be the one. I jus wana be there for you during your sad and happy moments. Maybe not Everytime but at least you will share w me part of your life. I jus wana be your sis n Fren for life. To be with you in your life journey. Not missing out in any of the stages growing old w u.Not just havin frens n sis in title only. I'm feeling v upset n confused. I dunno y u can jus do that. Jus ignoring me totally out of the blue. How did u do that? Teach me.. I would not be feeling this way If I can do half as good as u. Pls can u tell me ur plans? I will try my best to accommodate. But I need time. Pls bear w me. U know I'll do anything for u but I need more time n I need ur assurance.i can't do this all alone.. Not when I hv so many doubts. Pls I beg u not to leave me. I can't live without u I swear. I hate to see u unhappy. But y m I always the one who brings u unhappiness? Is there nothing u r happy w me about? I thought of what u r doing now is only temp.. But I'm afraid ull get used n not want me anymore. How can i not feel this way?Can u do better den me? This is not how frens Shld b n behave.. I'm not sure how but if we are unhappy, I dun tink it's right. Pls talk to me soon. We need to talk. I'm sure we can work things out. Pls Fren.. Dun leave me this way.. This is not the 1st time u've ignored me. It happened years back when u ignored me for 3nths +. I know u were angry w me then.. But I never knew what it was over.. Now it's happening again n the scary part is, I dun even know if u r unhappy w me or jus dun feel like havin me in ur Fren list anymore. I Need some enlightenment fren. Pls help me..U can do without me anytime i know..i cant.