Sorry Fren..again n again..Sorry..

Dunno wats wrong lately..
Things just dun go thta well for me..
The worst is: i made my fren angry again!!

Y did i do that?
Y did i lose my cool?
Y did i feel unfair?
Y did i make her feel so negatively abt the things i do and say?
Y didnt i try to control the situation and make it better and not worse??
Y y y Y Y y y ?? alot of qns in my mind..!!!
I jus dun understand y my fren tinks i dun wana drive..

she hates me..
she hates my look..
she hates my voice..
she hates my behaviour..
she hates every bit of me..
she just cant stand a min of me..
I hate it when i make her feel this way..
Y m i such a failure??

I cant even talk to her nicely whenever misunderstandin arise..
I cant even get her to hear me out..
I cant even convince her that i dun mean that way that she feel..
I cant even get her to cool down for a second to hear me out..
I jus cant do anything..
I cant even be understanding when she's feelin so tired..
Y m i such a bad fren??

Wat went wrong??
Im afraid she will ignore me again..
Im afraid she will be angry w me..
Im afraid she will be disappointed w me..
Im afraid she tinks i've done tt on purpose..
Im afraid she wun fren me anymore..
Im afraid she will disappear fr my life again..
Im afraid..

Wat shld i do??
I'm once again feelin lost..
I'm once again feelin sad..
I'm once again feelin all the unhappiness that i ever felt again long time back..
I'm once again feelin afraid..
I'm once again feelin insecure..
I'm once again not feelin my existence again...

I hope my fren will not be angry w me le..
I hope my fren dun mean what she said yesterday inside the car..
I hope my fren will cool down and talk to me soon..
I hope we can have a happy autumm festival together..
I hope i can attend my 1st piano class w my fren happily tomorrow..
I hope my fren will fren me again soon..

Plss...someone pls help me..
Ah fren, can u pls dun b angry w me??
I cannot afford to lose u de..u are already my forever fren..wat shld i do to maintain tis 'forever' promise??

I'll do anythin to make u happy again..dun disappear fr my life..